Friday, August 15, 2008

Scrabble and Golf

Why do I lose it when I play Scrabble and golf? Here's why:

Scrabble: I am a purported wordsmith. I got 800 on my verbal SATs. I can write okay. I am better than most of my friends and acquaintances at crossword puzzles. But I SUCK at Scrabble and I am thoroughly embarrassed by the fact. So when I try to play, my embarrassment turns into pettiness and poor sportsmanship and I get as mad as mad can be.

Golf: There are semifamous golfers who share my last name. When I took a golf class in college, my teacher was all excited because he thought I was going to be great by virtue of my last name. I did not do well. I SUCKED. I was so embarrassed that I could not live up to my name, and that embarrassment turned into the poorest of sportsmanship and the most childish of tantrums on the golf course. Since the worst of those tantrums, I took a solemn vow not to play golf ever again. This was in 1998, I believe, and I have stayed true to my oath.

So last night, Himself and I played Scrabble and I was so convinced I could keep my cool. I could not. It was a disaster.

So do I need to take an oath against Scrabble?